REJINAGAR STORY - Behaviour in Groups

In the town of RejiNagar there lived on the mountain side a demon called BurnOutasura. The demon had a craving once a year to chew on humans, suck out their juice and leave their bodies deadened, unfeeling and without sensation. The villagers agreed among themselves to find volunteers to offer to the demon. But after a few years it became very difficult to find any volunteers. The chewed-out people did not want to volunteer again…… ….

The above story serves as an analogy to our Hindu Samaj where it is becoming more and more difficult to find volunteers to serve on the Board of Trustees and doubly difficult to fill the President and Vice-President positions. Every year we have been hoping the problem would not be there the next year. But it is not going away. I do not understand why we have not given some serious thought to see what, if any, are the deeper aspects. The fact that the past 4 presidents, have, towards the end of their term, looked forward to the day they completed their term should also make us question as to what is happening to these people. And after the completion of their term they all have disappeared from the temple scene for months. Did the demon BurnOutasura chew and suck out their juices?

In the days when we did not have this temple, we felt a void in our lives. During its design, construction and financing stages there was a sense of cohesiveness among us, an electric current in our nerves, and an expectation that it would help us lift ourselves to higher ground of living and thinking. When the temple finally became a reality, we were fortunate to have some of the Hindu world’s renowned swami’s and guru’s come and inspire us towards a more sane and sensible life and living. We recently added to our altar a new diety – Kartikeya, to make it more inclusive. We have just acquired a priest who is trained as a priest. Our temple has also become a place of cordial fellowship. In our 20 years as the Samaj we have not broken into factions and splinter groups (as has happened elsewhere), and managed our differences with maturity, flexibility and dignity. Why then are people reluctant to come on to the Board and rise to positions of responsibility and honour?

Is the problem only the tip of an iceberg, is there more below the surface? Wanting to see what exactly is the problem, I have talked with some past presidents and Board members of the last few years, for their take on this problem. My own experience as President in 2005 gave me an empathic understanding of their perspectives. While the data is not exhaustive, I have presented it below, so we may all give some thought to solutions.

Some factors that are frustrating to Presidents are as below:

o High absenteeism of Board members, often a lack of quorum.
o Board members wanting to reopen issues resolved while they were absent.
o Board members leaving after signing the quorum sheet or after their presentation.
o Board member complaints on length of meeting, wanting resolutions in a hurry.
o Board members threatening to quit and even resigning on petty issues.
o Board members carrying on side conversations unrelated to the agenda item at hand.
o Solidified and inflexible positions on issues of some Board members.
o Board members thinking the president ought not to have any discretionary powers; that he is no more than any other Board member.
o Lack of commitment to tasks assigned, and laxity in duties of key Board members.
o Leaking of in camera discussions of the Board….. all details, even who said what.
o Conflicting guidance from those previously active in the Samaj.
o Never ending complaints from the congregation on minor and petty issues.
o Morale damaging gossip at weekend social gatherings of Samaj members.
o Arranging for weekly prashad sponsorship.

Conversely, from the Board Member perspective, the problems are:

o Undemocratic decision making by the President.
o President demanding performance at his/her beck and call.
o President unwilling to delegate or trust members
o President holding back decisions until the 11th hour.
o Differences in the perspectives of President and Vice-President.
o President overriding decisions made at Board meetings.
o Speaking up at meetings has the risk of losing friends and gaining enemies.
o Do not know Hinduism enough to base decisions on Hindu principles.
o Criticism of Board and temple activities at social parties; Not constructive criticism.
o Conflicting advice from those who have been in the Board at earlier times.

Roughly then, the above lists can be summarized under three headings: Group functioning, negative comments from the community, and guidance/input from those previously active in the Samaj. [Note that the above listing of items is not from any one year but from over the last few years. Also only the factors mentioned by more than one person are listed above.]

Group functioning problems are there in most groups put together for task accomplishment. On their way to become a team, they go through stages of development – forming, storming, norming, and performing. The caricatured picture at the outset of this writeup shows a group in the storming stage. Some come ready for a bloody battle, Some are ready to shoot any proposal. Some put on a ‘wise owl’ posture. Some are meek, unsure and afraid to speak up. Some feel gagged and muzzled. Some act indifferent. Some act as if they know everything. Some are reluctantly willing to be persuaded. Some act as clowns and draw attention to themselves. Some don’t want to contribute or be part of the group, but are all ears to the discussion going on. Thus at this stage of storming the group is not too functional. If this stage does not progress to the next stages, the task and mission of the group is adversely affected.

The second problem of negative opinions expressed in community social gatherings seem to have a demoralizing effect on the Board members and the President. But people in general like masala more than mantra. How this masala-talk can be stopped or how the Board can be shielded from it, is a question we all need to put our heads together to solve.

The complaints from the congregation are very many. I can vouch from my own experience that people do get upset in the mandir about all kinds of things: about somebody else’s behaviour, something not done right, something not prevented, and mostly about the inadequacy of opportunity for singing, and at the coveted time slot. I wonder whether this singing activity has come to be a competition, for recognition, status, honour, standing in the community and thus ego-enhancement. Responding to these complaints does chew up hours and hours on the telephone. And these complaints cannot be resolved to everybody’s satisfaction. This is a mental overload for any volunteer in the president’s position.

The third problem – guidance from those from the past, could be confusing, irritating and debilitating. The intentions of advice givers may be of genuine help and concern for the direction of the Samaj. But if different suggestions are coming from different people, the recipients (especially younger and new-comers) feel conflicted, confused and stalled. Advice from elders is a cultural value among us. But the present generation may feel torn between their preference to do it on their own terms and respecting the elders.

Arranging for weekly sponsors for prashad has come to be a major responsibility of the President. It involves more than making announcements from the podium for people to sign up. When there are gaps in the signup sheet, it involves asking friends, board members, and other people in the name of God. And still, many a time it becomes the job of the President’s wife (if the president is a lady, then she and her friends) to come early and cook the food, and stay late to clean up. This puts much stress on his/her family.

Thus, it seems to me that there are a number of interrelated problems and issues underlying the obvious problem of finding volunteers for the Board and President positions. I wonder if we all, individually and collectively, been part of the problem? Do we have the will to become part of the solution?

We can also speculate if the problems we are experiencing in the Samaj are due to our (cultural) not-so-flattering characteristics identified by our own (Indian) sociologists and social psychologists:

o Affiliation (relationships) is primary; Not task accomplishment
o Faith in words. Talking about a task is equated to task accomplishment.
o Presentation of socially desirable face (false face), not true face.
o Lack of differentiation between ‘what is’ and ‘what ought to be’ (or, should be).
o Personal loyalty to charismatic/inspirational leaders, not to the organization.
o Passivity and lethargy in serious matters but a lot of wasted energy in transient matters such as movies, movie stars, fashion, Cricket etc.,

However, the above may not apply to us -- immigrants such as ourselves -- who have been known to be industrious, intelligent and educated. We are the envy of the local people world over.

What I have penned above is my one man’s examination of our annual birth pangs. I feel I have hardly scratched the surface. I hope nobody will think of me as the bearer of bad news, and call for my head on the chopping block. That is OK too as long as the block is genuine Burma Teak! But before you put my head on the block, do let me hear your comments, observations and insights on the above.
- Kalburgi.Srinivas@gmail.com

PS: My email directory is rather old and I do not have the email address of many newer members of the congregation. Hence feel free to tell others, make copies for them, or forward, if you think what I have said above has some merit.


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